


Who is Like God?

by Arones



Series: Accidents of the Heart [3]
Category: Sanctuary (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F, F/M, Kidnapping, Rape Mentions, Turmoil, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-20
Updated: 2012-06-20
Packaged: 2017-11-08 04:39:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/439249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arones/pseuds/Arones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Magnus sends Emma on a mission that might make or break the young woman. Rated "E" for violence and adult content.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> No 3 in "Accidents of the Heart" Series

Magnus slammed the door open and let it hit the wall and rebound back. She caught it on her hand and glared and the young buxom blonde who was resting cross legged on her bed with the laptop angled off her knees and was typing furiously on the keyboard. "This has got to stop." Her voice boomed and Magnus watched as the young woman froze, slowly moving to look up at the intruder.

"I don't know what you are referring to." Emma shut her laptop after hitting a few keys on the machine and set it aside. Her back was rigid and she turned to fully face the woman that was standing in her doorway still. Taking a quick breath she held it in her chest ready for the onslaught and the argument that was about to ensue. It had been their M.O. for the last few weeks.

Magnus drew in a slow and deep breath, "That is complete bullshit and you know it." She took a step in and slid the door shut with a loud snick. She spun around with fire on her heels. "You have been completely avoidant of me. Skipping meals, skipping staff meetings as well. This is ridiculous." She crossed her arms and stood her ground. "This cannot continue or I can't even keep you on my staff."

Emma didn't miss a beat. "Fine, then fire me. God knows anything would be better than working under a domineering, control freak of a tyrant."

"How dare you call me that in my own house?"

The blonde stood and faced down the taller woman. "How dare I? That is a prime example of what the hell I'm talking about, Magnus." She spit out the woman's name in disgust. "This isn't just your house, we all live here. You can't control our lives just as much as you can't control the god damned weather."

"I am still your boss. You work for me. You must do as I ask."

"Oh asking." Emma took a step closer. "What a concept?" She raised her hands and eyebrows staring down the woman and being sure to give as much as she got. "Have you asked anything of us? No you order, you demand, you tell… you never ask. If you had asked I wouldn't have moved in here. I wouldn't have stayed here or worked for you for that matter. Yeah I might be an abnormal and a damn rare one at that, but I was doing fine on my own without you." Emma was staring nose to nose with the steaming woman and she knew she was winning the heated argument. She had her caught in the rabbit's hole and there was only one way out.

Magnus gripped Emma by the back of her head and pulled her face to hers so she could mash their mouths together. Emma resisted vehemently, struggling against the pressure that was forcing her into the embrace. This had not been the escape she had thought Helen would take. She grabbed hold of Helen's cheeks and forced her head away. "What the hell?" Magnus didn't blink before pulling Emma back in, their lips crushing and her hand brushing over Emma's side until it reached low on her hip. She shoved backwards and Emma landed on the bed with a bounce listening as her computer felt the ripple and moved, sliding off the bed to crash on the floor.

She turned to try and prevent it, but had little chance as Helen was straddling her and pushing her further onto the bed. Magnus had Emma's shirt off and was working at her bra, her teeth scraping down Emma's neck until she found a mole just above her collar bone. She suckled it hard, biting her teeth until Emma cried out in pain. She pulled back and grasped both of Emma's mounds and squeezed before brushing her thumb pads over the erect nipples. Emma was breathing hard and clutching to Helen's dress suit to keep a grip on what was happening.

The spit was hard to swallow and her mouth was dry when she tried; she was barely controlling her breathing. Magnus' lips were once again on hers and she couldn't help but kiss the woman back. When the teeth bit into her lip and scraped hard she winced and pulled away. "Helen stop." She said it forcibly, hard and sure of herself. The brunette moved off her quarry and sat to the side while staring at Emma, her eyes trailing from the beautiful and swollen lips to her chest and back to her eyes. She was silent. She had been silent for a long time. Emma looked back and watched carefully seeing no remorse from the woman. She turned on her side and away from Helen, her back curved and her body in the fetal position. She rested her eyes and covered her breasts with her arms. "You can leave now." She felt small, like a pebble in the roadway not even worthy of being kicked by a passerby.

"I'm sorry." Helen's hand was warm and resting on Emma's shoulder. She really didn't want to leave; she wanted to resolve whatever it was that was going on between them. However, if Emma asked she would go.

Emma shuddered from the sudden chill that ran up her spine. "I said you can leave now."

Helen leaned down and pressed a chaste kiss to the woman's shoulder. "I'm so sorry, Emma. I didn't mean to…" she took a deep breath. "I didn't mean to take advantage."

"Of course you didn't." She muttered before curling tighter. "I want you to leave." Her face was buried deeper into the duvet and if Helen didn't know better she was about to cry. Helen slowly extracted herself and walked to the door. She turned back and looked at the woman still curled on the bed. She wanted to issue apologies once again but decided against it. Instead she left the room and went back to her office with no issues resolved and probably leaving whatever relationship they had in further detriment.

Her office seemed lonely as she sat carefully in her chair, her mind churning and swirling with things she could have done differently. It was rare that she second guessed herself, but for some reason she was completely second guessing the choice she had made. Things had always been heated between her and Emma, there was no shut off valve to the sex that they exuded when in the same room, but for the last month or so it had been nothing but anger, arguments, fights, yelling matches and silence.

Her thoughts were disturbed when Will came in with a heaviness in his step. He sat down and slid a file across the desktop to her. "Got a call from Mihovil." He stumbled over the name but eventually smirked when he got the right pronunciation.

"Ah." Helen took the file and opened it.

"He needs someone out there right away to help with an abnormal that he caught. He said he's having issues keeping it under control." He watched as his boss' eyes scanned the document and the information that he had.

"This isn't a lot to go on."

"I know, but he is being insistent."

Helen hummed and bit her lip looking over the information once again. "I'm not comfortable sending Emma by herself, not to Croatia for sure, and it's been quite some time since Mihovil decided to contact us. If I recall he wasn't the easiest to deal with then, I doubt he'll be better now." She was thinking again and Will watched. He loved to watch her think, to see her mind working through everything rationally. "You can't cancel your conference can you?"

"You promised not this one. And I'm still not completely fit to be on the mission list."

"I would make an exception in this matter."

He shook his head. "I really can't, if I do it again I'll never get a call back to speak."

She nodded and bit her lip again. "Henry?"

"Vacation with Erika in Maui, I think."

She nodded again. "And of course my old friend is… unavailable. I would by far prefer a male escort. Maybe Declan can spare someone?"

"They're having a massive security issue and have a sudden influx of intakes. I think he might be able to spare someone but only in a serious crunch."

Drawing in a deep breath she let it out. "I suppose she's going alone then. Will you please inform her?" She handed the document back to him. She turned to her computer and Will waited for the flight information that he would need.

Emma was sitting, with her arms crossed on the third flight of her incredibly long day that could do nothing but get worse. First she had found out that one of her friends from university, when she had gone back for another degree had been diagnosed with cancer, stage four, and then Magnus had stalked in all pissy like something very sharp was up her tiny, round and pert little ass. Emma huffed out a breath as she put that entire incident out of her mind. Oh, and her computer and broken in the middle of said incident that was being ignored so she didn't even have anything to bring with her on the flight except her skimpy iPhone that was linked to Magnus and was more like a leash than a way to freedom.

She kicked the seat in front of her and shifted her legs so that her butt wouldn't go numb. Then she didn't even have the audacity to come tell her she was going on a mission to Croatia of all freaking places by herself in, oh, little under two hours. Just Will, standing awkwardly looking at her and her red rimmed eyes saying, "Magnus has a mission for you." She could tell he'd wanted to ask her about what had happened but and butted out of the situation probably because her significant other was his boss. Oh the joys of drama within the Sanctuary network. She let out a sigh and turned her head to rest her eyes just as the seatbelt sign came on and the co-pilot announced their final descent.

The shoe covering her foot was tapping nicely against the horribly carpeted flooring while she waited for her bag. She hated flying, and she hated flying coach even more, and Magnus knew that. It was probably why she'd been stuck by the bathroom in nearly every flight too. She saw the man she was supposed to meet up with and waved him over just as her bag appeared. Reaching down she swung the duffle over her shoulder. "Hey, I'm Emma."

"Welcome, I'm Mihovil. There's a car waiting outside." She followed him dutifully surprised that he had been the one to come pick her up, usually it was an underling. She shrugged it off and the hard knot that was rapidly building in the pit of her stomach as she followed the dark skinned and haired man out the doors. They made it to the car, which was a sleep looking sedan and she sighed. There was someone in the passenger seat, which meant she would have to sit in the back. The trunk popped and she set her bag into it before sliding into the passenger side backseat.

Apparently there was a third man in the car because as soon as her door shut the chloroform soaked hankie was pressed to her face. She struggled against it as soon as she could, holding her breath and extending her claws but the man in front of her just twisted and leaned around stabbing a sharp needle into her leg.


	2. Chapter 2

Magnus was landing the plane in Croatia. She had left Will behind and in charge of the Sanctuary when the feeling in the pit of her stomach that was gnawing at her refused to go away and she'd had no word from Emma or Mihovil in five days. She would have left sooner but there was little that she could have done to leave before she did. She knew that Emma was angry with her when they had parted ways, but she didn't think the young woman was vindictive enough to not answer the phone when she called.

When the cell had stopped ringing and went straight to voicemail she had made plans to fly and figure out what was going on. She had no operative near the area and so she was flying in herself with no further intel than what she already had, which was next to nil. She adjusted the controls and began her final descent. It wouldn't be long until she had some answers. She would have loved to bring Will with her, but there was very little he could do to help if she ran into any trouble. He was still recovering from the 'conquest of Vladic and the pipe bomb that could' as he had so aptly called it.

Helen set the plane down and left it in the hanger before going to find a vehicle and a hotel. She needed a base in order to start, a place where she would be able to come back to and unwind after finding no answers. The car was easy to find and soon she was driving along a busy road in a foreign country that she had only been to a few times in her lifetime. And all of those times before she'd had someone else with her. Even with all her defensive tactic training, her sharp shooting skills, and her observant nature she knew that sometimes it was just easier and safer to travel with a male companion.

Quite often women would travel to this land in hopes of being an au pair, volunteering for an NGO to help some down trodden people and were never seen from or heard from again. Human trafficking was not a crime in these parts; it was a way of life, a very good career. She took a deep breath and gripped the steering wheel tightly turning onto another avenue. With the people they worked with and the fact that since Emma had moved into the Sanctuary her abnormal abilities had become common knowledge and with all of the computer hacks they had been having as of late, the danger the young woman was facing was ten-fold. Which was why Magnus hadn't wanted to send her in alone in the first place, but her options had been limited.

She bit her lip and let it pop from between her teeth before taking another turn. If only she'd left Emma to her own devices and not convinced her to join her cause, then she would be safe at home in New City going to work at the local Child and Family Protective Services as a social worker and paying her rent on life. Doing a fine damn job of it, she had been too. Helen had been so selfish. She should have seen it.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Mihovil watched as his second came into the tiny room with no furniture except a bed. He was just zipping his pants after fucking the whore tied to the small cot. She was so drugged that she hadn't moved during the entire ordeal. The door was shut soundly and the man spoke. "Magnus just landed."

"I expect a house visit soon then." He wiped a hand over his face. "Send her home. She is useless for now." Walking from the room he made his way from the whore towards the garage.

There was a slight hesitation before the man spoke again. "You don't want me to kill her?"

Mihovil paused in his stride and didn't look back at the man in question. "Who is like God?"

"You are."

There was a brief pause before he moved and continued on his way. He only had to wait until dawn before Magnus arrived at his front door. She was escorted in by two of his guards who had kindly left her armed. He had told them to do so of course.

"Mihovil…?" Her voice was question and warning mixed together.

"Helen Magnus." Scathingly he strode toward her, drawing her name out like it was a prayer from his lips. "So nice to see you here." He nodded to the two goons that had brought her in and they left.

"Where is Emma?"

"She's safe." He smiled at her and his eyes went black. "You know, I do believe there is something about my physiology that you don't know."

"Oh really? And what is that?"

"We are immune to stunners." Just as he said it there was a flash of light from somewhere out of her line of sight. Magnus hit the deck in reaction, her body curling into the fetal position and her heart pounding before the blackness over took her senses.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

She recognized the gates when she opened her eyes. She was outside of the Sanctuary on the other side of the walls than she wanted to be. Groaning she turned onto her side and felt the roiling in her stomach begin, the light from the sun was blinding her. She vomited onto the sidewalk, her body heaving with each retch that racked through her. It took her far longer than she had anticipated to work her weak body that was still resting heavily on the ground to the iron rods of the gate.

Reaching out, she grasped the cold, cold metal in her fist and started to pull herself up. She lasted long enough to press the code into the key pad and watch as the gate swung open. She collapsed when she went to move toward the opening, her body landing in the way of the metal guards. It started to swing shut and she rolled so it landed on her back and her stomach rather than her ribs. The metal was pinching her and she was finding it harder and harder to breath. Her stomach was rolling again and she started dry heaving until the black and fuzzy sensation took over her eyes and her ears buzzed. She fell into the darkness on her own just as she saw the feet of Will coming toward her.

He'd heard the alarm as it sounded and when looking at the video camera he saw the limp body. He'd run from his office through the halls down the stairs and out the front door. She was completely unconscious when he got there. Reaching to his belt he groaned when he realized that his radio was not attached. There wasn't time enough to run back inside for assistance. He needed to get her in to the infirmary right then and there. Sliding over to the keypad he opened the gate until he could pull her free from its tight grip.

Grunting from the force he dropped her hands and closed the gate before gentle picking her up in his arms. He made it to the front door before he realized his second dilemma of the day. He had to open the door. Setting her down, he swung open the doors before picking her up again. Finally they made it into the infirmary and he set her onto the gurney. Pulling over the monitors he began to undress the rags from her body and slap on the nodes to monitor every vital sign he could think of.

Her body started shaking then, violently against the bed. He watched as her limbs flailed up and hit the side bars that he had raised. He needed to tie her down. Running to another drawer he pulled it out and grasped the five restraints. He really didn't want to do this, but he saw little other option. He tied her legs down first and then her writs before strapping the middle one over her abdomen. She was convulsing so much at that point that the bed was rocking on the stationary wheels.

Then it stopped. Suddenly and without warning all her movements stopped. He reached forward and pressed fingers to her neck, not quite trusting the monitors. Will sighed an audible relief when he felt the steadying beat of her pulse under his fingertips. He closed his eyes breathing deeply and tried to settle his own heart rate that was beginning to beat faster. What the hell was this? He heard her moan softly and he looked at her face. Her lips started to part and he could see words forming, but no sound was coming out. He shook his head and moved to grasp a needle. He would need blood, she was obviously not herself.

Pressing the needle firmly into the skin on her arm after cleaning off the gunk and dirt with an alcohol swab he drew the blood he would need. Probably needed an IV too, now that he thought about it. He set the vial aside and moved around searching for the necessary items he would need. One year of med school had in no way prepared him for this. He would have to recall the Big Guy to help out. After three or four tries in many different places in her arm he finally got the IV started and set. He needed information and unless she was going to wake up he wasn't going to get any from her, not that she was ever forthcoming with information anyway.

He was just leaving the room after standing there for another fifteen or so minutes, really not wanting to leave her alone. This was why he let Magnus do all the medical stuff, so he didn't have to deal with patients on this level. Either that or he just need to have the ability to be in two places at once, like to astral-project somewhere else, or split into two and be rejoined hours later. It would be the perfect ability. His thoughts were interrupted when he heard her voice call softly. "Wi—Will?"

Going back to her side he took her hand carefully and let the warmth from his own fingers seep into her skin. "Hey there. Yeah it's me."

"Mmmm." She swallowed hard, either searching for words or clearing a very dry throat. "Wh-where am I?"

"You're home." He pressed fingers to her neck once again and her lids fluttered open for a second. "You're at the Sanctuary."

She shook her head rapidly and violently from side to side as if she was trying to rid an unknown aggressor from only her face. "No…" She kept on doing it until he rested his palm against her face and she calmed.

"You are here. I promise you, you're safe now."

"Will?"

"Yeah, I'm right here." He was still gripping her hand and her cheek. She wasn't look at him. "Where am I?"

He sighed; this could be a long night. "You're at the Sanctuary. You're safe now."

She nodded and began to shake again, slightly this time her muscles tightening and pulling. The tears streaming down her face making clear tracks from the dirt that was caked on her skin. "Will?"

"Yeah?"

"How did I get here?"

"I don't know, Emma. I don't know. I was really hoping you could tell me that." His thumb was brushing lightly over her cheek bone in a soothing and calming manner. "Rest now, I'm not leaving. I'll be right here when you wake up."


	3. Chapter 3

She slept for two days straight almost, waking up periodically to Will working on a computer, with files in his hands, or a phone pressed to his ear. The Big Guy had been in a few times and when her body started shaking again he'd pressed more drugs into her system. She distinctly remembered it and shouting that she didn't want it to happen. When her eyes woke up this time she was staring into the curious face of Will, worry echoing back at her. "What's happening?" She was shivering and the pain was running throughout her body.

"You're in withdrawal."

"F-from what?"

"Cocaine and some other things."

She shook her head. "Didn't do it."

"I know; they gave it to you. You've been through the worst of it for now." His hand was running up and down her arm. "Do you remember anything of what happened?"

Emma started to nod and then shook her head. She didn't want to remember. "Where's Helen?"

"We don't know. She went to go find you and never came back. She hasn't reported in. It's been a few days now."

"Go, find her." Emma worked to sit up, her shivering continuing and the aches and pains in her body increasing, but she didn't pay mind to it. She was fully sitting up, leaning heavily on her knees. "I'll stay here." Will sat back in suddenness and she cringed. "I'm fine." She answered to his questioning gaze.

"I'll think about leaving in the morning, but the Big Guy is staying here with you." She nodded in agreement and he helped her to stand. "He said to leave the IV in for another day or so, but that you could go back to your room when you wanted. Just have to take this thing with you." His arm was around her as they began to walk, very slowly, toward the door. When her knees gave out he forced her to sit in a wheelchair with very little resistance from her.

She stayed that night in her room, still hooked to the IV and restlessly sleeping, if it could even be called that. The Big Guy had checked on her every few hours and the hours that he didn't enter Will had come in with periodic updates of the information he had about Magnus. Declan had sent a team to Croatia to do some of the ground work, but they had made little headway into her whereabouts. It was as if she had disappeared with no trace. He had made arrangements to leave in the afternoon to join Declan's team.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Magnus screamed when the hot iron rod seared across the skin of her abdomen. She hadn't been expecting such pain, but the suddenness from it forced the sound from her lips. She'd been doing well thus far, the excruciating pain hadn't been enough that she'd screamed but with the drugs in her system there was no telling what would happen. The tiny burn that they made, she could see it when looking down, was so small against her stomach. After breathing through the rest of the nerve shattering sparks that had floated through her body, she rested her head back and felt the small tear from the hurt slide down her cheek unbidden. It was barely anything; though the wound was already bubbling into a blister it couldn't have been larger than a quarter just above her belly button.

"Wh-what did you give me?" Her head felt like it was spinning when she rested it against the reclining chair that she was strapped to. The holds on her wrists and ankles were burning and hurting her skin so much that she was having a hard time focusing on anything else. The man standing above her had a mask over his face and she could only see his dark chocolate eyes. He didn't answer her. It wasn't the first time she had asked a question and had gotten no answer. "When will you be done?" He ignored her and she started screaming again when the hot iron rod was once again placed against her overly sensitive skin. She was mostly naked with scant and dirty cloth covering certain parts of her body. The metal wasn't leaving her skin this time like it had before, in fact, there was a second rod added to the mix just below her collar bone, following the line of it.

It was ripped off her body just when the blackness was beginning to take over her eyes sight and the rest of her body had heated. She had been about to pass out, but the pull of the skin that was seared onto the now cooling metal ripping from her body had pulled her right back into reality. There was a needle pressed to her arm and blood drawn while her head tilted back and forth and she tried to regain her composure. Even under this kind of torture she wanted to be one up on her game. She was drawing in deep and short breaths when the bucket of ice cold water was thrown over her face. Gasping for air she felt the fist backhand her.

There was something else that was pushed into her system. She could feel it as it started to take hold of her body. The tingling sensation as it worked through her veins from her arm down to her fingers and up to her shoulder. She tried to move and fight off the sensation as it continued to barrel onward throughout her body but there was nowhere that she could turn to. She was strapped to the chair and it was inside her.

Her body was shaking so violently that she couldn't stop it. Her voice was whimpering and her eyes tightened shut against the hold the drugs had on her. Whatever she had been given was slowing everything down. When the hot rod was pressed against her skin once again she could barely move, she couldn't avoid it, and she couldn't make it stop. She just laid there and let it happen, her mind screaming at herself to make it stop: not only the pain, but her non-reaction to what was happening. She wanted to kick ass, she wanted to get free and kill the guy that kept pushing different chemicals into her blood stream and then taking samples from her body.

The man who had been with her almost since she had been brought there took the samples and left the room. When he returned his hands were empty and his eyes on her again. "We're done with you." She started shivering again. It was the first time she had heard him speak and his accent was decidedly Slavic in origin. The way he was looking at her had her worried. Her body wanted to retch, but there was no way she could move the medications still taking over her system. His fingers moved over her body, over every curve that she had.

When the door slammed open and the gunfire went off the first bullet whizzed past her stationary form before she heard the second one hit its mark and the man fall onto her body before sliding to the ground and dying. Will was at her side in two seconds flat taking his jacket off and throwing it over her scantily clad form. He took her face between his hands and forced her slow body and brain to focus on him.

She wet her lips trying to moisten them to speak. She couldn't remember the last time that she'd had water. "E—Emma?"

"She's fine. She's home." She nodded and closed her eyes again as he began to untie her wrists. The rest of his team was moving around the room looking awkwardly from him to the woman on the chair. "Gather up what you can, we're going to need to know what they were doing to her." The others went about their work and he carefully took her out of the room.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Big Guy was going about his cleaning duties. Will had called and informed him that he'd found Magnus in a small Chilean town near the tip of South America. Emma had taken to her duties like she had never before. He'd refrained from commenting and asking questions: it wasn't his nature. He would let her deal with what had happened in her own time and way, but he was very careful to watch her. Two days and Will was set to return; he'd been gone only a week to find their boss, but he wanted to make sure that she was well enough to travel before they did so.

He finished with Magnus' office and moved to Will's. That was when he heard the piercing scream. Dropping his feather duster he moved rapidly to the room down the hall. It had come from Emma's office; where she'd holed herself up in for the past week. He opened the door to find her smooshed into the corner between her desk and the wall, shivering and shaking and rocking back and forth, arms over her knees and her eyes buried in her legs. She kept whispering, "Who is like God? Who is like God? Who is like God?" When he reached down to press a large and hairy hand to her shoulder she jumped back jamming her elbow into the stone wall and her eyes wide with fear until they focused on his face. It took minutes for her to calm further, for her breathing to slow and the color to enter back into her cheeks.

"Emma?" His deep voice rumbled and she felt it in her own chest. She bent her head again and let the tears fall. "What happened?"

She shook her head violently and ignored him while she began to shake again, the images coming unbidden in her mind. She hadn't done anything to warrant the memory to take hold of her. She hadn't done anything. Again she started to repeat herself. "Who is like God? Who is like God? Who is like God?" The Big Guy gave up and sat on his bum in front of her, dragging her body into his and wrapping his arms tightly around her. She barely resisted the move, but she remained tightly curled into herself. It was maybe an hour before she began to slowly relax and turned her face into the hairy man still holding her. He was sure she was completely calm and mostly back to the way she had been before but he remained where he was. "Helen?"

"Will found her. They'll be back in a few days."

"How bad?"

"He said she was experimented on, but nothing else." Emma nodded into his beard and felt the braids against her soft skin. "Remember anything else about your time there?" He felt her tense again and was sure that she did.

"No." Her voice was short and quipped upon answer. "Where was Helen found?"

"Chile."

Emma took a deep breath and bolstered herself before sliding away from him. She wiped her eyes with her fingers and then her hands on her jeans. She moved to stand and he let her. "Well, I better get back to work." He let her move away before standing himself and starting towards the door. "Biggie?" She was biting her lip when he turned back around. Her eyes were shaded but wide and her cheeks pink from embarrassment. "Thank you."

"Anytime. Only between you and me promise." He nodded when she accepted what he had said left the room. Emma took a deep breath and stared at her now sleeping monitor.


	4. Chapter 4

"Hello." Helen was situating herself on the edge of Emma's bed; the young woman had woken to her entrance into the room. It was late and she'd just arrived back and was checking on the woman she'd gone in search of.

"Hey." Emma replied, her eyes watching Helen as she smiled at her.

Helen drew in a deep breath, her chest rising with the pressure of the air before she let it fall. "I thought maybe we could talk."

"Now?"

Emma rubbed hands over her face and looked at the clock: just past one in the morning and there was no moon outside. It had been the first time she'd managed to sleep in the past week without a nightmare and she'd only succeeded to have Helen wake her up. Not that the woman knew so she really couldn't blame her.

The brunette was watching her carefully, her eyes taking in the small form on the bed. She looked tired. Will had told her a bit about the recovery, but not much beyond that she had been released and had been addicted to cocaine. She would have to look at the file later; well as soon as Will filed it, which she would make sure would happen soon enough. She sighed heavily and answered, "Yeah, unless you'd rather wait."

"It's the middle of the night."

"Alright." Helen patted the leg that her hand was still on and started to stand. "We'll talk later then."

"Helen—"

"It's fine, Emma."

There was a huge intake of breath from the blonde as she sat forward. It was as if she was going to say something but the warning look in Helen's eyes changed her mind. Magnus couldn't place it, she saw Emma give up; it wasn't something that she knew the woman to do. Often Emma would speak her mind and very forcibly, so to see her suddenly stop the words made her pause. Emma closed her eyes and leaned back. "What did they do to you?"

"Few experiments. Took lots of blood. Nothing detrimental." Helen was looking over the woman once again. There was something off, something that she couldn't quite place, but it was the middle of the night and they hadn't left on the best of terms when the entire scene had gone down. "You?"

"Not much; held me in a room basically." Emma could hardly breathe, the tightness in her chest was increasing and she was fairly sure that Helen saw it but she could do nothing to dissipate the feeling.

Helen was speaking and Emma barely heard the words. "Are you alright?"

A deep breath and release later Emma spoke. "Yeah, just… just tired you know?" Helen nodded her eyes watching the woman carefully. Once again she patted Emma's leg and moved away to the door.

"If you need anything, only two doors down."

"Yeah." Emma swallowed heavily and scooted down in her bed as the door shut behind Helen.

Magnus walked down to her office and started in on the files that had accumulated there after changing her mind about returning to her room. Yet, there was something that wasn't settling right in her gut. When she looked up at the clock it was well beyond three in the morning and Will had stalked in with a weary look on his face, heaved a breath and collapsed on her couch. She looked up and looked over him before moving to sit aside him.

"Can't sleep?"

He shook his head and rested it against the back of the sofa and closed his eyes. "Time change."

Air was pulled into her lungs. "Yeah, know what you mean." She licked her lips slowly and glanced in his direction. "Care for some wine?"

"Yeah."

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Emma was done after she'd laid there for two hours and had barely even been able to close her eyes. Every time she did she would hear something, they would snap open, and she'd find herself sitting upright in bed with her heart pounding and her nails digging into the palms of her very sweaty hands. She couldn't get around it. Donning a pair of running pants, shirt and shoes she plugged her headphones into her ear and made her way to front doors of the Sanctuary. She needed to run, and she needed to run hard.

Pushing the heavy open she stepped outside into the heavy rain and grimaced. She hadn't even realized it was raining when she'd left her room and she'd been staring out the damn window for hours on end. Drawing in a deep breath she stepped out into the cold rain and let it fall on her drenching her hair and clothes. She tucked her iPod into her sports bra after locking the screen and made for the front gate. She needed a long run.

Her feet were pounding heavily on the ground and she listened carefully to the beats that they made. Her eyes were looking ahead of her but she wasn't seeing anything. She drew in a deep breath and let it out through her nose, steadying her breathing as she ran so that she would last longer. She turned a corner down an alleyway and decided that she liked the darker and quieter aspect of it better than the street lights that seemed to be blaring and yelling at her. She shook her head when a particularly angry drop of rain landed on her eyeball and stung. Crossing the street without looking from side to side and landed a foot in the middle of the pavement when her playlist stopped and there was no sound from her headphones.

"Damn it." Muttering to herself she ignored the silence and raced on, her breathing becoming the only thing that she could hear. It was echoing in her eardrums, the intake and outbreath that was making her continue. Four more blocks and all she focused on was the sound that caused her to keep going, until she stumbled and half landed into the brick wall of an old building. Her arm was pressed into the harsh surface and she was half doubled over trying to catch the air that was escaping from her lungs far too quickly and had simply run away from her.

Breathing and choking on the vomit that was threatening to rise from her stomach she finally had a moment to look up. There was a man standing in front of her with a scruffy beard and Mariner's baseball cap on his head. His fingers were scratching at his arms and he was barely making eye contact with her. In fact, he wasn't making eye contact with her. His would look up and then back down over her body. Emma stood up straight and wiped her face with the back of her wrist and stared at his person. T-shirt that was dirty and faux leather jacket that was loud against the rain that was still pounding down on them, his shoes had holes in the toes and his laces were completely knotted together. Stepping forward she watched as he shuffled his feet but stayed where he was. This was his alley. She got that from his stance. Her head bounced up. "What you got?"

His hand appeared out, palm up for a brief second before he closed his fist again. She'd seen the small little orange pouch that was obviously made for selling. "Ten?"

"Twenty."

Her eyebrows rose and she nodded slightly and spoke firmly. "Ten." His head started to nod and wouldn't stop until she reached forward after pulling the slim bill from her sports bra. He handed it to her and in the same move took the money. She looked down at the small bag now in her fist and when she looked up he was gone.

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By seven in the morning Will claimed that he had to go get dressed, not to mention sober up a bit. He and Magnus had been drinking wine for the past four hours or so and he needed to get ready for what was sure to be a very long day. It wasn't going to be long because of things that he had to do, or because there was an emergency somewhere. It was going to be a long day because he'd been up for about two days straight and running only on caffeine and adrenaline for most of it. He was walking through the corridor and ran into Emma. She was drenched through. Her hair was plastered to her face and her clothes were pulling at her body with each move that she made. "Hey?" He questioned her, leaning against the wall with his arms over his chest.

"Hey." Her eyes grew wide and she watched him like a hawk.

"Go for a bit of a run?"

"Yeah."

An awkard and silent pause took over then before he broke it. "Come by my office today, will you?" He watched as her shoulders squared and her jaw clenched.

"Real busy. Paperwork and all that."

"Come by my office Emma. It's not up for debate." He watched as she walked away from him knowing for a fact that she would not be stopping by his office that day. This was going to take far greater skill to get her to see him. And it might take a greater ability than he had to get her to talk once she was in the room with him; he hadn't had to practice pure psychology in years. He'd better brush up on some of the latest techniques.

Detouring back to Helen's office he knocked on the door before entering into the room. "Will, did you forget something?"

"I might need your help."

"Oh?"

"Emma."

"Oh."

"Magnus?" He would have sat in the chair across from her but he wanted to be on his toes. Helen glanced up at him before looking back down and drawing in a slow and deep breath.

"Truthfully, Will, I'm not sure how much of a help I can be." She folded her hands on the desk to prevent herself from fiddling with the files.

He drew in a deep breath and finally sat. "What happened?"

"Honestly I don't really know. We were fine, everything seemed good. Then Henry discovered Tesla's invention and something seemed to change. I can't pin it if she's just scared or if I did something to hurt her or if the complicated nature of any relationship with me and the Sanctuary was just too much for her to deal with. I didn't think it would be…"

"…but you didn't talk about it."

She nodded in agreement. "We didn't talk about it."

"What else happened, Magnus?"

Her eyes shot up to his face and lingered before looking back down. "Nothing."

"Magnus, you know me… what else happened?"

There was a long pause before she began; she wasn't sure how much she wanted to tell him. "It's more than infatuation, Will. At least on my part."

"Ah."

She nodded. "We had a fight and I might have been a bit too forceful."

"In actions or words?"

The question stopped her in her tracks. He was too damn observant for his own good sometimes. "Both. That was just before she went to Croatia and I'm not convinced that nothing happened there."

"Nor am I." Helen nodded her agreement and affirmation.

"I can make meeting with you mandatory to keeping her on staff but in the short time that I've been back I haven't seen any reason to do this yet. It would not look good in her file."

Will nodded and began to depart. "Then wait."


	5. Chapter 5

Magnus noted when she walked into the room; she was the second one there aside from Will and sat in her designated chair in the corner of the yellow sofa. They were waiting for the rest to arrive and for their staff meeting to begin. She wanted to be anywhere but that room and she'd taken a risk showing up without anyone and before anyone other than these two. The two people that she had learned were the most observant and the most forward with what they said and did. They would have no issue telling her exactly what they thought. However, she hoped, sincerely, that not making eye contact with either would encourage them not to speak with her.

And it worked. Neither one spoke to her throughout the entire meeting. Magnus had read her report, worked over it, talked about what had happened and the case was officially closed. Emma wasn't paying attention and didn't notice that everyone else had left the room and Helen was sitting across from her staring at the young woman who had her head face down to the ground. Emma said nothing as she began to stand and move out of the room. She stopped when she heard Helen's voice quietly question. "What is it that I did?"

Emma was standing behind the woman, the door two feet from her and Helen's back was all she could see. The brunette didn't turn when she heard the footsteps stop; she didn't turn and beg for an answer. Simply, she waited. "Nothing."

"Will you talk to me?"

"There is nothing to talk about." Emma brushed an errant strand of behind her ear and left the room to begin her tasks for the day. It was her turn to do the feedings. Helen had given her the task for the week, which meant, barring any major emergencies that she would not be going on any great missions.

Starting with the task that she was given she went through the motions. She made up the cart and filled it with the food, or what some called food. She didn't even grimace at half of the stuff she piled onto the cart. Slowly as possible she started the push the car through the hallways and made her way through the chore.

Helen leaned over her monitor and turned to the cameras in the SHU watching as Emma made her progress. Will had alerted her to something that she had not quite seen in the short conversation she'd had with her. He seemed to be very right in his mention of it to her. The young woman seemed to be as a shell walking from one enclosure to another feeding and then leaving. When she made it to one particular habitat she pulled out a chair and sat it outside the window. Opening the door she slipped in the food and watched, arms crossed over her chest, eyes opening and staring but unseeing as the exhibitionist abnormal ate in front of her. Helen looked down and then at her other monitor beginning some work. She must have been busy for twenty minutes when she saw the sudden move out of the corner of her eye.

Staring at the other monitor she watched Emma pick up a bowl of food and toss it across the room slamming the metal into the stone wall and denting it. She let out an amazon scream before staring and breathing heavily at the floor. Her fingers clenched and unclenched as her breathing continued to be rapid. "Who is like God?" She picked up another bowl and began to chuck it aside. Just as Helen stood to head down Emma stopped mid-motion. The young woman stared down at her hands before setting the bowl aside and drawing in a deep breath. She folded the chair and stuck it in the corner where they always kept it. She left and returned with paper towels and supplies to clean up the mess that she had made.

Magnus sat back down heavily in her chair and watched for a while longer before going back to her own work. She took a deep breath and looked into the results from her own blood test that they had taken shortly after her rescue. She and insisted that Will take the sample and was simply waiting for the results and the time to read them over. Her eyes began to scan the results not seeing much out of the element. Her white blood cell count was up as was her antibody count; however, that could have been indicative of the burning she'd endured from the hot iron rod. The sores on her flesh started to ache when she thought about them and she tried to put them out of her mind. There was nothing else that she could see that was wrong with the results from the test. She would take another one in a week or so to look at the change.

Bringing her body to her phone when it rang she answered quickly ready to get back into the work that she really needed to be focused on. "Hello?"

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Helen had watched the young woman carefully for days on end. It had been two weeks since she'd been dropped at the front doors to the Sanctuary by some unknown person and she had seemed to be improving. Improving might have not been a technical term but at least Emma hadn't tossed thrown or screamed in the last four days. She also had missed two staff meetings, hadn't graced Helen's office with her presence in more than twenty-four hours straight and wouldn't look at her directly in the eye. She was closing in on herself and nothing Magnus tried had worked.

Granted everything that she had tried had been extremely subtle in approach, she hadn't wanted to scare the poor woman more than she already was. And fear was something that Magnus was sure that Emma was feeling. Other than that she couldn't quite be sure. An experience of being kidnapped especially at such a young age when one wasn't used to being in such an environment could be extremely detrimental to the livelihood of that person. It would seem that Emma was falling deeper into the depression that Magnus feared would ruin her.

Once again glancing at the monitor that had fast become her best friend and constant companion Helen saw the young woman sitting, yet again, in the chair in front of the Besovite enclosure and watching them eat their food. They were exhibitionists and were smearing food over each other until one of the creatures stopped and looked at Emma. The young woman was seated, legs crossed at the ankles in front of her, arms folded over her stomach and her head down, eyes straight forward almost glaring. It would have been glaring had she actually been looking at something. The creature started banging against the window and soon the others followed suit. They were trying to gain Emma's attention. Helen stood and made her way to the door. It was time for a small chat.

Emma finally noted the noises in front of her, but instead of looking at the creatures she stood with her face to the floor and walked towards down the hall until she reached the security door. The Big Guy was standing there watching her carefully and she didn't stop. She moved right into his body and gripped him around the waist pressing her face into his chest and drawing in a deep breath of his woodsy and fresh scent. She was clinging to that smell.

It was so different from where she had been just moments before. It was musty, sweaty, or dirty. It was clean, wood fresh cut, and damp leaves and dirt. The differences were astounding and exactly what she needed. Drawing in another breath she felt the arms fit around her tightly and she held on as the tears began to stream down her face and soak through the thin shirt that he was wearing. He rested his chin on the top of her head, craning his neck to do so, but he didn't care. He could smell Helen coming, hear the click of her heels on the stone floor underfoot, but he wasn't going to shift if the woman in his arms wasn't going to.

He was sure that Emma had no idea when Helen entered into their presence. She was so lost in her own thoughts that she didn't move when the woman pressed a gently hand to her back and began a soft pace of rubbing up and down in a soothing manner. She exchanged a look with her old friend and glanced back to the woman who still had her face buried in his chest. Helen, Biggie and Emma stood there for minutes on end not moving and not changing pace as the young woman clung to the Sasquatch.

Emma didn't want to move. She knew Helen was standing so close to her side that she could feel the heat from the woman's body but she didn't want to remove her face from the chest it was concealed in. She didn't want to look at the woman's pale blue eyes filled to the brim with concern, curiosity and, most importantly, pity. She didn't want pity. She wanted to fix this, she wanted to get out of whatever the hell it was that was going on all on her own and she didn't want anyone to witness it. It was the longer she remained where she was that she realized Helen wasn't going to leave and she would have to face her.

She drew in one last breath of the cleansing scent that was the man she was clinging to and pulled her face from his body. Her hands left his sides and wiped the remainder of the tears from her cheeks and eyes and she started to move away from the two and down the hall. "Emma?" The woman's voice called and Emma heard her take a step, but stop suddenly.

Risking a look back she saw the large hand on Helen's arm and nodded her thanks to her new found friend. "I'm just going for a run." Turning again she left the vicinity to go for another very long run. She needed to find the man in the Mariner's cap.

Helen waited until she was sure the woman was out of earshot and turned to her old friend. "What was that about?"

He shrugged and knew that his response would be unreasonable and unacceptable in her eyes. "Can't talk about it."

The words left his mouth and hit her full force. She was stunned. He was not one to talk or gossip, no, but to risk the mental health of someone because he refused to talk about issues. That was surprising. Normally he would come to her with concern for someone, but this time he was refusing. "I need to know to help her."

"You cannot help her." He started toward the trays with food and sat in front of the Besovites so that they could continue their feeding ritual. In his mind the conversation that he and Helen were having was over.

She had other plans. "What's that supposed to mean?" His eyes skimmed over to her and the look he gave caused her to pause. "Oh…" She took a deep breath and bit her lip. "Not at all?"

"Not at all."

"Really?" Again he gave her the same look he had just given her and she let out a puff of air looking at her shoes. "I really complicated this didn't I?"

"That's an understatement." The humor was back in his voice and it made her smile. Maybe not all was lost.


	6. Chapter 6

Four days later and Magnus woke suddenly sitting up in her bed and looking around the room. There was no one there, no one taking vials of blood from her body, or injecting things into her. She'd been dreaming. Remembering, actually. Drawing in a deep breath she rested against her pillows and tried to calm her heart that was speeding. She was tapping out a rhythm on her stomach while staring at the ceiling. If she couldn't fall asleep by the end of the pattern she would get up and go work on a project.

She'd finished the pattern not once, but twice. For some reason, she couldn't help but not want to get out of the warm covers. It was still dark outside, glancing at her clock she noted it was just past three in the morning. Maybe there was something for another hour of sleep. She was turning on her side facing away from the window when she heard the quiet whispering. "Helen… who is like God?"

The woman sat bolt straight up in her bed and looked around the room. There was no one there. Not a soul nearby; she couldn't feel a presence. She was gripping the edge of the duvet and decided to finally get out of bed. She wasn't going to sleep anymore after that. Pushing the covers down to her shins she heard the scream from down the hall. She was up and out of bed and moving down the corridor before the scream even finished.

Standing at the door to Emma's bedroom Will was right behind her as was everyone else. She issued them all the look and they left except for her young protégé. He wasn't going to leave, this was his job. Nodding to him she pushed open the door to find Emma struggling with the blankets on her bed and shoving them down to her feet. She was covered in a tank and shorts and Helen could smell the sweat and fear coming off her body. Will stayed by the door as Magnus slowly took a step inside. "Emma." She said the name firmly, but it was as if the woman heard nothing. She stated it again while she carefully and slowly made her way to the side of the bed. She didn't want to frighten the girl any more than was necessary.

Helen sat on the edge of the bed and pulled the rest of the blankets off Emma's feet. The young woman shot up and into Helen's arms and clung to the brunette's body like a lifeline. Her face was buried in Helen's soft locks and she was trying to calm her breathing. Helen's fingers were running up and down Emma's back in a calming and soothing motion. Will took a step inside after watching the two for nearly twenty minutes and Emma tensed pulling back, fear in her eyes as she stared at him. He stopped suddenly and held up his hands in surrender. Helen's hand settled on Emma's thigh and she only had eyes for the young woman. "It's alright. It's just Will."

Emma curled back into Helen and rested her face in the dark locks. "Make him go away." Her voice was so tiny, so small and afraid that Helen could do nothing to resist it.

"You'll have to speak with him soon." Emma nodded in understanding and waited for Helen to make him go away. The brunette looked over at her protégé and nodded slightly. He motioned to the door and silently told her that he would be waiting for a report on whatever was going to happen. They would need to talk separately before he tackled whatever it was that Emma was going through. Helen carded fingers through the young woman's hair, their cheeks pressing together so that Helen could smell Emma's sweet shampoo.

She waited an hour before the woman considerably calmed. She had to know, had to figure out exactly what was going on. "Talk to me, Emma." Her voice was soft and pleading. "Tell me what happened."

"Nothing happened."

Drawing in a slow breath Helen continued to slide her fingers through the long hair and cradle the body into hers. "I do not believe for one second that you were held by Mihovil and nothing happened." At the sound of his name the woman in her arms folded further in on herself.

"Who is like God?" The young woman whispered it so quietly Helen didn't hear anything beyond the mumble and murmur of her voice.

"What did you say?"

"Mihovil." Emma winced at the name. "Mihovil is like God."

"No." Helen took hold of Emma's cheeks and drew the young woman's face up to hers. They locked eyes and Helen spoke again. "No, he is not like God."

Emma started to push at Magnus until she was free from the woman's grip. She needed to get out and away. She needed to go for a run. "I um… I… I'm going for a run."

"Emma, please wait." The young woman was already standing and pulling on her socks and shoes. "Emma stop." Helen stood and tried to make her cease, but once she set her hand on Emma's arm the woman recoiled and Magnus stopped. "Talk to me."

The blonde turned and stared at the woman, her eyes raking over her body as she stood before her. "I'm sorry." She shook her head and made her way for the door and out of the Sanctuary confines. She was running again, but this time she didn't take a detour. When her feet pounded on the pavement she knew exactly where she was going, exactly what she needed. She didn't even wait. As soon as she met the man with the Mariner's baseball cap she took the small pouch from him and walked to the end of the alley and to the park.

He followed her closely and they sat heavily under the tree and she looked at the small pouch. She hadn't wanted to end up down this path but it was so damn helpful. It allowed her to concentrate, to feel better, to not be afraid. She needed it. Taking the spoon from the man she started to dissolve the small piece. He would let her go first; she had paid for it after all.

Rolling the tiny piece of cotton she set it into the heroin and let it soak up the liquid. The needle she had brought herself, she always did. She even brought one for him. She pulled her shoe off and cleaned the space in between her big toe and her second toe of any sock lint that was present. Drawing in a deep breath she set the sharp needle against her skin and stuck it into the vein. Depressing the top she pulled it out and set a finger on the small wound until it stopped bleeding and healed. It was an advantage to being part vampire, almost instantaneous healing of small insignificant injuries.

Her head rested against the trunk of the tree and the man next to her had his share. The warmth began in her toes, as it always did and worked up her body until it reached her chest and she couldn't help herself from sliding her head over to look at the man sitting next to her. Twenty more minutes she sat there grinning before she stood and started her run back to the Sanctuary. Helen would no doubt be in a tizzy if she was gone much longer.

Sure enough, as soon as she entered the great doors the woman was waiting for her. "Have a good run?"

"Yeah, much better now thanks." Emma wiped her sweaty palms on her tank and starting to calm her breathing from the jog. "Adrenaline and endorphins, best prescription ever."

"Hmmm, yes." Helen was dressed in a skirt and heels, her hands neatly folded in front of her body and her eyes suspiciously looking over Emma's. "Are you going to talk to me now?"

"There's nothing to talk about." She started toward the kitchen to grab a bottle of water and heard as Helen trailed after her. "Nothing happened there and nothing happened tonight except a bad dream. Those are allowed in this house yes?"

"Emma… I want to believe you, but I honestly can't. And I can't help you if you won't let me."

"You can't help me anyway." She took a long sip of her water and wiped the sweat from her brow. "I'm going to shower."

"I want you to talk with Will."

"There's nothing to talk about." She spoke as she left the room, again with Helen following close behind. She finally stopped at the elevator and smiled at the woman standing close by. "Honestly Helen, I'm fine." Her eyes crinkled at the corners and her smiled was genuine. "I just had a nightmare; we all have them in this house. It's not a big deal. I'm fine."

Helen quirked an eyebrow in her direction. "Fine? Emma…" She really hated to take this tact but it was all she could do to get her point across. "Mihovil?" The face across from her hardened and her eyebrows furrowed together.

"It's nothing. It's what his name means; look it up. Google it." She stepped into the elevator and glared at the brunette as the doors shut. Helen let out a breath and took the stairs to Will's office. He was waiting for her as he'd silently promised. She sat across from him and held her breath tightly in her chest.

It took her time to actually speak and she still wasn't sure what her decision was going to be until she actually spoke. "Alright."

"Are you done waiting?"

"Not yet." Her eyes glanced at him before smiling. "She's growing suspicious and… there's something else, but I'm not quite sure what it is yet. I don't want to push her too hard before she's ready."

Will nodded and shuffled a few of the papers on his desk. "When will you make her come see me?"

"When she's ready." He let out a snort and she ignored him. "It's time for our yearly audit at the school. I was going to send her, but I think Alexei might like to visit with you. It was mentioned to me last I spoke with them that he would very much like to see you again, as would Lily." He nodded in understanding of what she was doing. She wasn't comfortable forcing Emma to participate in a therapy session but she could force them together in a very confined space or, in other words, a plane. "I think I'll let you take the private jet, I'll have no need of it while you're gone." Even better, then Emma could rant and rave all she wanted and would really have nowhere to run or hide from him.

"When would you like us to leave?"

"In a week. I need to give them fair warning that you're coming."

There was a silence that passed between them and she was just getting ready to leave when he spoke up. "Magnus…" She stopped and waited for him to continue. "How is everything with you?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean you were held captive, experimented on and come back into the folds like nothing has happened."

"Ah." She paused and was once again looking at her clasped fingers trying to find the words to express exactly what was going on. "Nothing else happened beside that, if that's where your concern lies. I'm dealing with it well; rest assured this is not something that I haven't been through before."

"Doesn't mean it's the same."

"True, but it also doesn't mean that I'm left with no devices." He nodded and she had effectively ended the conversation.


	7. Chapter 7

She was glaring at him from across the tiny tube that they were seated in. She hadn't wanted to come, which said something about the state of her mind to him because of all people, being a former social worker, she should have wanted to go spend time with children that had been placed by her hand. That's all she did the entire trip: glare at him with arms crossed over her chest and a pissy look on her face. He'd given up trying to talk to her after an hour in to the flight.

They landed and were picked up by a driver to be taken to the school. It was a boarding school, per se, so they would be staying on the grounds for a week. They would conduct a quick audit, meet with the personnel, do a review of the facility, sit in on some of the classes and meet with students. Will was used to doing this once a year, but it was the first year that he would have someone with him. Not to mention her state of mind wasn't exactly the best.

Making it through the first day without a hitch wasn't difficult. Emma had plastered on a sweet smile and worked her charm. They had only dealt with the headmaster and administration. The next day they were due to sit in on classes. They each brought their own bags to their rooms and he bid her a goodnight. She ignored his comment and slipped into the doorway and shut it in his face. Sighing heavily, Will moved into his own room and called his boss.

The plan of attack was simple. Do as much work as possible in the next week, return home and Magnus would officially take Emma off the mission list until she sought help. It had gone on long enough. Will knocked on her door in the morning so that they could go down to eat breakfast together. She still wasn't speaking to him, which was painfully obvious when she opened the door, glared and set out in front of him to the dining hall. They were seated with the instructors and watched as the daily routine went on for the students. Neither Emma nor Will wanted to interrupt anything; however it was impossible because just their presence interrupted.

As soon as she walked into Garthaw's class he ran up to hug her. He brought her around to his desk and certainly attempted to pay attention to the teacher but he was far too excited to do so. He hadn't seen her in months. Will was having a rather similar experience with Alexei although the young man, and that's what he had become, was far more reserved in his affections. The young man had spent a good deal of time with Will, but both had other duties they needed to get to. Alexei left to do his homework just as Lily was released from her class and came bounding up to Will. He picked her up and spun her in a little bit of a circle before settling her on his hip.

He let the girl talk animatedly about whatever it was on her mind and was surprised that she was so outgoing and happy. He was quite enjoying seeing her. The moment was interrupted when Emma opened the door to the room they were in and she looked over Will who happened to be smiling down still at the young girl in his arms. "We have that meeting."

"Right, I'll just be a second." He watched as her eyes flicked over the girl before she shut the door and left. When he turned back to Lily she was frowning. "What is it sweetie?"

"Why she so sad?"

"Oh," he sat on one of the low tables and put her on his knee so that he could look her over. "Something very bad happened to her. She's just trying to figure out how to fix it."

The little girl nodded. "She scared."

"Is she?" He brushed a hand over the back of the girl's head and down her hair.

She nodded in response and then jumped from his lap. "I make something."

"What are you going to make?" He grinned and tried to follow her but she made him stop and walked him backwards to the door.

"Secret." Grinning Lily pushed him out the door and waited until he held up his hands in surrender and smiled.

"Alright, I get it. I'll see you later, ok?"

Lily nodded and shut the door to get to work.

Hours later Emma came flying into his room later with a look of pure rage shadowing her features. "What is this?" She held up a piece of paper and glared daggers at him.

Will took his time and slowly rose from the bed he had been laying on. He set the book to the side and straightened his back. "I don't know. Let me see it?" He held out his hand and waited for her to hand it over, but she just continued to wave it in front of his face.

"How could you do that? She's a little girl she doesn't need to know anything about what happened! It's none of her business! It's my business. She's too young to deal with something of this magnitude."

It was about halfway through the rant that Will figured out what she was talking about. It must have been whatever it was that Lily had been doing. He suspected, by looking at what it was in the woman's hand, that the young girl had made her a 'feel better' card and left it in her room. He grabbed her wrist hard and wrangled the card from her hand and read it. Sure enough he was right. "I didn't tell her anything. She figured it out all on her own."

"Figured what out?"

"She asked me why you were so sad and scared. Emma, if a little girl can figure that out you have to see that the rest of us can." She didn't answer. She didn't know what to say, her stomach was hot with anger and her head felt like it was going to explode. "Emma talk to me." His eyes were soft and he opened the floor once again for her.

"There's nothing to talk about. I was raped, it's not the first time it's happened I doubt it'll be the last. He touched me and…" She took a deep breath trying to compose herself. Will watched as her eyes started to water and her nose reddened as her cheeks paled. "…and I didn't want him to. I didn't want him to do that." The tears began to stream down her face and he watched as the weight of what she had finally admitted settled in the tension of her shoulders. "He's not like God but he wanted me to think he was. He thought he was." She wasn't even bothering to brush the tears from her face; rather she let them cling to her chin before slipping from her heating flesh. "Why did he do that?"

"I can't answer that and neither can you. I doubt that even he can." The nod was subtle and slight but he caught it. "Come on, sit down." His fingers gently guided her to the bed and she sat letting her head rest on his shoulder and the tears wrack through her body. Will settled an arm lightly around her shoulder and exerted the least amount of pressure as possible.

They sat there for hours and she didn't talk. He didn't talk. They just sat. Hours and hours, missed meetings and dinner and into the middle of the night when she finally stopped gripping his shirt. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

She sat up straight and fiddled with her thumbs. "I haven't slept in days."

"That's not uncommon."

She nodded slowly and her eyes flicked up to him. "Can I stay here?"

"Why do you want to stay here?"

Shrugging she took her time answering. "It's helpful to have someone else in the vicinity. Easier to get back to sleep."

He nodded. "Alright. Will you set up regular times to meet with me?" At the slight nod he took her affirmative answer as all he was going to get and stood slowly. He pushed back the blankets on the bed and let her settle in under them after pulling her shoes off. Will moved to the other side of the bed and lay down on top of the blankets. It was only a few more hours and she was finally asleep. Will was resting with his back slightly up against the headboard and his phone in his hand.

Finally daring to let the light in the room he sent a quick text message to his boss: 'made progress, will be setting up meeting times, her idea.' 

'Good. Call tomorrow with an update on the school please.' The response was short and to the point and quickly received. He left it at that and set his phone to the side table after turning his alarm on. He needed a few hours sleep before the day started and since she was asleep he figured he could take the time.

The gut wrenching sound of vomiting is what woke him up. He looked over to the bathroom to see the door slightly ajar but mostly closed and the light on. There was movement as the coughing and sputtering started again and he could see the blonde hair falling down around her face. Sighing he slipped off the bed and made his way over grasping her hair and rubbing a hand over her back. He waited until she wiped her mouth with a washcloth that she had and sat back on her heels. "Thank you."

"How long?"

"An hour." She rested back against the tub and pressed her face against the cold surface.

"The flu?"

"I think so."

"Isn't your vampire part of yourself supposed to protect you from that?"

Her eyes were closed and she drew in a slow breath before answering. "I'm only part vampire, and so no, not always." She started a slow breathing pattern that was quickly building and he could tell that she was going to start heaving again. He waited until she was over the toilet before holding her hair in a fist and running water over a clean washcloth.

Once he finally had her calm enough that he could get her to the bed without vomiting he was already late for a meeting and had missed breakfast. "I think you should stay here today." She nodded and curled into the pillow that he had given her. He tucked her in and pressed a hand to her forehead. "I'm going to send the nurse up, alright?"

"I'm fine."

"Humor me… and Magnus would kill me if I didn't." Her head slightly moved up and down in affirmation and he left the room to go about his duties and fix whatever he had missed the night before. He sent a text to Magnus telling her that Emma was sick and his phone started to buzz immediately with her name and picture on the screen. "Hey."

"I think you should bring her back here. The rest of the inventory at the school and be done over distance."

"She'll be fine, it's just the flu I'm sure of it."

"Will."

"Magnus." He mimicked her tone. "You can't control every little thing in her life and right now she needs as much space as you can give her."

"I'm not entirely sure that they didn't experiment on her. With her reactions—"

"I don't think that they did."

"Did she talk to you?" He could feel the longing in her voice. She really wanted to know what was going on.

"She did a bit."

There was quite a long pause before either of them spoke. "Bring her home Will."

"We'll only be here another two days and then we'll be back."

"Alright." The resignation from her was not something that he was used to hearing, but he was glad that she had given in. It was necessary for Emma for her to give in every once in a while, whether or not she realized that.


	8. Chapter 8

Unfortunately Emma's stomach had not calmed down in the seventy-two hours since it had started acting up. She'd had moments of feeling far better but the nausea was taking all the energy out of her. It was zapping it from her very being. She hadn't been permitted to leave Will's room and he had taken care of her each night when he wasn't in meetings. The nurse at the school would stop by and check on her every few hours and when that wasn't happening she was left to her own devices.

The flight back to the Sanctuary and in particular the drive from the airport to the actual building itself threw a huge wrench in her system of how to stay even-keeled. They had to stop multiple times in order for her to vomit up acid onto the side of the road. Will had called ahead and spoken quickly with Magnus so she was waiting when the car pulled into the garage. She had a wheelchair ready and would have nothing of it when Emma insisted that she could walk. She was wheeled down to the infirmary where Magnus drew a vial of blood and started an IV. Helen's lips had been pressed in a thin line the entire time and she had only given Emma orders in terms of moving, staying in bed or changing into a gown.

Emma slipped into a light sleep just before Helen left the room to head to the lab. She met up with Will on her way and he followed her until she was seated and setting up the tests. He was giving her the update on the school and was droning on, but she was listening. She reciprocated, when he'd finished, with what had happened the past week at the Sanctuary including a rather fascinating story about Henry who had inadvertently electrocuted himself with his new stunner. Will was in fits and giggles when the she turned to check the computer.

The results were just coming in. "Will," her voice was apprehensive and her eyes were scanning the monitor. "Did you notice anything odd at Emma recently?"

"Nothing that wouldn't be expected. Why?"

She hummed, "Her drug test came back positive."

His eyebrows rose and he leaned over her shoulder to read what she was looking at, his front pressing into her back. Even if most of it didn't make sense to him, he still felt the need to look. "Positive for what?"

"Opiates."

"Opiates?"

"Yeah…" She scanned through the results and bit her lip. "Oh this is not good. Not good at all."

Will ran a hand over Helen's shoulder and squeezed lightly. "What is it?"

"With her physiology the amount she must be taking… it's probably the highest dose you have ever seen anyone take. Her physiology would make it almost impossible for it to be absorbed."

"So what happens now?"

"We have to talk to her." She rose and slid her hands into the pockets of her lab coat. She glanced at him before making her way into the infirmary and to Emma's bedside. The young woman was still sleeping. Helen checked her forearms where the traditional track marks would be, but since she hadn't seen any when she set the IV she had figured Emma was sticking the needles elsewhere. "Will, would you mind giving us some privacy?"

"You sure?"

Helen stopped, her hand on Emma's arm, her eyes sliding up to the man's face. He was so genuine and she could read the concern that was emanating from him. "Yeah, I think she would rather I examine her on my own." She waited until he shut the door and she heard click before she started again. She picked obvious spots and started between Emma's fingers. Her next stop was her toes. It was there that she found what she was looking for. Track marks. Sighing heavily she sat on the edge of the bed and slowly shook the woman awake. "Emma…Emma wake up."

The blonde slowly roused from sleep, but sat up straight as soon as she opened her eyes and saw Magnus sitting next to her. "What's wrong?" She was rubbing at her eyes trying to wake up fully for whatever emergency it was. "What happened?"

"Nothing happened, calm down." Helen pressed a warm palm into Emma's thigh.

"What's wrong, Helen? Come on, it's written all over your face."

Drawing in a deep breath of air, she debated how to start. Aiming for the easiest and fastest way to the issue she spoke. "How long have you been taking the drugs?"

The air tightened and became heavy with tension. Emma's stomach dropped to the other side of the planet before swinging back around and jumping into her throat threatening to come out. "Before you came back." She refused to make eye contact with Helen. She also refused to lie. There would be no point.

"Is this withdrawal?" Emma nodded solemnly and Helen chewed on her lip. Standing she moved to the medicine cabinet and came back with a small glass filled with liquid. "Methadone."

"No. I'll stop without it."

"I'm not giving you an option. It's a small dose."

Emma stared the Dixie cup down before she reached out and took it in her hand. She swirled it carefully and downed it in one gulp. Handing the cup back to Magnus she turned on her side and curled into the blanket that was covering her body. Helen squeezed her fingers over Emma's leg and swallowed. "You don't have to do this alone. We are here for you."

"I know."

"Do you?" There was a long pause where neither woman looked at each other and neither spoke. It took minutes to tick by slowly before Helen voiced her concern. "You've been so distant lately and I can't—"

"This isn't your fault."

"Emma…"

She sat up and cupped Helen's cheek, the IV line pulling slightly, but that was easily amended by Magnus' quick hand. "Look, none of this is your fault. You sent me down there yes but I could have always said no. You did not plan for any of this to happen. It's part of the world, shit happens…you can't control it." Her thumb brushed lightly over Helen's cheekbone as she waited for the blue eyes to open on her face.

"I can't even help you through it."

Emma shook her head. "You can't. No one can. You have to understand that."

"I do, it's just… I don't regret bringing you into the Sanctuary. I doubt that I ever will."

Leaning back into the bed and wrapping her arms around her middle Emma let out a loud sigh. "Well that's good to know." Her hand found its way into Helen's and she kept their fingers firmly attached. "I'm sorry." At the raised eyebrow she continued. "For being a bitch, before… you know…"

"Ah yes." Helen nodded. "Me as well, I'm afraid." There was a quiet pause as the two let the tension fade from the room. It was unfortunate that Helen knew she would have to bring it back into the conversation. She waited until after Emma had eaten the lunch that her old friend had brought them. The methadone and IV fluids along with anti-nausea medication that Helen had given her upon arrival helping to the point that it was the first time Emma was anywhere near close to keeping food down in three days.

She was fading into sleep quickly, but Helen was reluctant to leave her. The young woman had been clingy by her accounts, touching her hand whenever possible and actually opening up a bit. Not necessarily about anything that had happened while in Croatia, but about her life in general. Magnus took it as a sign of great improvement. She brushed the backs of her fingers over Emma's forehead sliding the loose strands of hair behind her ear. "Emma?"

"Hmmm?" There was a smile that graced her lips.

"Emma… did you know you were pregnant? Or that it was even a possibility?"

Every muscle in the woman's body tensed. Her breathing started to increase, her chest rising and falling rapidly and her stomach churning violently. "I can't be pregnant."

"You are."

"You don't understand… I can't be pregnant." She was slowly sitting up, her eyes wide with fear.

"Calm down, take slow deep breaths." Emma tried to comply and when Helen felt she was close to normal she started to speak again. "I would like to do an ultrasound, confirm how far along you are." Emma nodded sharply and waited as Magnus pulled over the equipment necessary. She had already warmed the gel and there was a slight awkward moment when Emma started to pull up her gown and the blanket slipped but as soon as she was positioned on the bed Helen wrapped a hand around her thigh and looked closely at her. "Are you ready for this?"

"I can't be pregnant." Her head shook so minutely it looked close to a seizure, but it stopped. Helen licked her lips and turned to the machine grabbing the gel.

"Unless there is some medical reason of which I am unaware you are perfectly capable of carrying a child to term." She didn't squeeze the bottle onto the woman's stomach, waiting once again for confirmation.

"Do it. I can't be pregnant. You'll see."

The blue gel was warm against her stomach, but the muscles still fluttered at the odd sensation. She raised her hand above her head and waited as Magnus rubbed the wand over the flat abdomen. It only took a moment before the tiny peanut shaped fetus appeared on the screen. Magnus didn't say anything; instead she took measurements and froze the picture sending it via the web to Emma's virtual medical file. She did this a few more times before she twisted her hand and smeared the gel further. She might as well check for any deformities while she was there. Finding none, she went back to the peanut.

"It can't be."

"Emma. This is a fetus, about four or five weeks along."

"I can't be pregnant, Magnus. You really don't understand."

Freezing the image on the screen she cleaned the wand and set it back into its holder. Taking a cloth she cleaned Emma's stomach and pulled down the hospital gown that she was wearing. "Then tell me why you can't be pregnant."

"I just… I can't be pregnant. You need to terminate the pregnancy. Right now."

"Emma—"

"No argument, Helen. Right now."

Helen stood up and pushed the machine away before coming back to Emma and sitting down, her arm straddling the woman who was still lying on the bed. "I want you to think about this. I know the circumstances are the least of which you would want, or anyone would want. But I do want you to think about this."

"No."

"Emma."

"Do it."

"Emma. Stop. I will not be terminating the pregnancy tonight, or this week for that matter. I want you to stop and think about this." Emma was shaking her head. "Are you listening to me?"

"You really just don't get it."

"It doesn't matter if I get it. You've been through a lot this past month and I want you to carefully think this over. I don't want you to do anything that you'll regret."

"I won't regret it."

Helen sighed heavily and drew in a deep breath to calm herself. The conversation was going in circles and she was becoming quite frustrated with it. "I will terminate the pregnancy if you wish, but take the time to think about this. Please. Convince me that you won't regret it."

"And how do I do that?"

"Time, Emma. That's all I'm asking from you."

"Then you'll terminate?"

"If that's what you want, then I will terminate the pregnancy… yes." They were at a standstill. Each woman had dug their trenches and the war was just beginning.


End file.
